Me For Me or God Through Me?

Daily Readings: 2 Kings 2:1-15; James 5:16-20; Luke 4:25-30
Ընթերցուածքներ` Դ Թագ. Բ 1-15; Յակ. Ե 16-20; Ղուկ. Դ 25-30 

In the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, Amen!

An angry man, was driving down the highway, when all of a sudden his phone rang. He ignored it, and again it rang. He ignored it again until, finally he answered the phone snapping, “what? I’m driving, I can’t talk now!” Frantic, the voice of his wife on the other said, “Where are you? Be careful!” Why, what’s going on? he answered. “I just heard that there’s a car driving on the wrong side of the highway.” The husband said, “one car? You should see, all of them are on the wrong side.” My dears, how often is it that when someone points out our faults, our mistakes, our first instinct is to jump into defense rather than reflection? That the fault is not in us but in everyone else.

Christ while preaching in the synagogue gives the example of the Prophet Elijah and of how in times of famine and difficulty God sent the Prophet to a widow who was not a Jew, not a part of the community; or of how the Prophet brought healing to the Syrian, not the Jewish people because of the disobedience and faithlessness of the Jews at the time. The response? (vv.28-29) “So all those in the synagogue, when they heard these things, were filled with wrath, and rose up and thrust Him out of the city…” The Jews felt angry that Jesus was calling them out for their faithlessness, their sinfulness. How many of us are guilty of this as well my dears? Perhaps we live lives and make choices that don’t align with what the Scriptures teach us, with what the Church asks of us. Politically, socially, in our relationships, in our day to day, we live in such a way that is unacceptable or hurtful when compared to what is taught in our Christian faith. Our reaction when we’re called out is often to be filled with anger and desire to throw Christ out of our lives, fabricate a false version of Jesus Christ leaving us momentarily satisfied but broken in the long term.

Yet, my dears, to be a Christian begins from self-examination and reflection. To be a Christian is to walk as Christ walked, grow in God’s likeness, be a light in darkness. To be a Christian is to ask not do people accept me for me, but rather, do people accept God through me. When we read our Holy Scriptures, when the priest or the teachings in the Church challenge us, or call us out, speak out against something we do, believe or choose to live by, we need to ask with wisdom and prayer, why do we feel this way? If we know and believe that God loves us, if we truly believe that God is our Heavenly Father, then we need to recognize that His love is going to challenge us to be better, stronger, and wiser. Not because we are always wrong, not because we are devalued but rather because God knows our full potential and provides the best for us.

In seminary, we had an English teacher who would give us daily assignments. One of those daily tasks was dictations – where he would read out loud and we would copy down what he said. Following his dictation, we were told to rewrite his story in our own words. Every time, no matter what we wrote, our pages would come back with red pen marks with instructions of how we could rewrite it better. One day, a classmate of mine decided he would just hand in exactly what was dictated without any further changes. When he received his notebook back, it was again covered in red pen marks with instructions on how we could reword it better. This wasn’t because our teacher disliked us, but because our teacher wanted us to live up to our full potential, beyond what we recognized.

Truthfully, as a student all we wanted to do was get the task done, get the grade and leave the classroom to do what we wanted. As Christian’s we act this way as well; all we want is to be happy, to “do the right thing” to somehow satisfy God and then leave Church or “leave our faith” to do what we want, what we think is best for us. In the process we hurt ourselves; we are left angry, dissatisfied, hurt and unsure. Yet, our Heavenly Father desires more for us and of us. God corrects us out of love and teaches us that He already knows what is best for us, if we would only remain faithful and obedient to His Will. This obedience my dears, starts with reflection and prayer!

In James we read, “Confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” Confession, which is one of the Holy Sacraments of the Church, which is done privately to God, with the aid of the priest in the Church is that self-reflection of our challenges, of our struggles, and the choices we make that tell us we are on the wrong “side of the highway.” To confess is to be transparent; to confess is to verbalize and seek is God in our actions and choices. Is God in our relationships, is God in our addiction, in the way we treat our bodies, in the way we dress, in the way we live. If God is not, how can we change in order not to bring God into our choices but for us to enter God’s love. Confession is a reflection of seeing those red marks in our life not as condemnation but as correction for us to live to our full potential; asking what needs to change and how can we change so that God’s fullness is seen through us. Inner reflection and acceptance that the darkness of this world does not define us, our faults to break us, but the love of God our Heavenly Father is what saves us.

This reflection leads to prayer my dears. A thankfulness for God’s love, gratefulness for another day to grow. Prayer is asking for help to be transformed in heart and mind to live according to His Will. Prayer is openness of our heart; prayer not as laundry list of things we want transactionally from God but prayer as an openness to listen to learn; learning as we wait. When we pray and we wait for God to answer, what do we become? What do we become when we’re waiting? We become waiters! When a waiter is waiting on a table, what do they do? They serve! A waiter serves. When we pray with openness we wait to learn from God by serving. Serving each other in prayer and love. Yet, how many of us are willing to be this open? How many of us are ready to serve rather than be served? How many of us listen with this openness of learning? How many of us are ready to come and confess seeking transformation? Verses how many of us instead react with anger to the challenges, the Cross that God places before us?

To be a Christian is not easy. It is to face challenges from outside and inside. If we come to Church all our life and we never feel challenged, if we read the Scriptures and never feel uncomfortable when we reflect on our life, if we have conversations with our priest and don’t feel pushed to grow, than we have failed. For the way of our faith is through the Cross. Yet, it does not end with the Cross for through the Cross of Christ we are led to the empty tomb. My dears, God our Heavenly Father loves each and every one of us, regardless of how we look, how we act, what we choose. Even if we deny Him, He loves us and waits for us to turn back to Him. It is we who must, therefore, respond to that love, desiring to be transformed and changed. Christ Jesus by His love and grace has already broken the chain of sin, it is we who respond in faithfulness by turning to Him and not chaining ourselves back to our passions, to this world and the material darkness. The Holy Spirit comes and illuminates our hearts and mind, teaches us with wisdom, and compassion. It is we who respond by walking in faith, reading our Holy Scriptures, praying with sincerity, sobriety and reflecting the love of God. If we truly are faithful Christian’s, children of our Lord, we need to ask do we want people to accept me for me or, do will my life be a cause for others to accept God through me? This is a challenge given to us all, Amen!